How to get rid of toxic people

“Negative people can only infest you with discouragements when they find you around… Just get lost and get saved!” Israelmore Ayivor

We can find toxic people in our daily lives. Most of us encounter toxic people either at our workplace, in iur daily lives or we have relationship with a toxic person. People who drain our energies, non supportive, emotional abusers and back stabbers are mostly known as toxic people or negative people. They make us feel bad intentionally. Whether they do it because of their insecurities or their need to feel superior, they still end up hurting us in order for them to feel satisfied.

Toxic people are not hard to find as they have certain tendencies by which they are easy to locate. Some of the signs of toxic people are written below;
Their selfishness can be spotted anywhere. They are quite selfish, always putting their needs before others needs.
They are generally insecure. These insecurities can of because of anything or either any person.
They are egoistic and thismakes them to feel that they’re always right as they think they’re far more superior than others so everyone should listen to them.
They often mislead you. Try to twist things to make you depressed or anxious about things important to you.
They never appreciate others, as to toxic people only they are perfect.
Toxic people are not nice to others. Never say nice things to people and never cherish their feelings.
They are attention seekers and can lie to get that attention. They love creating drama and getting all the attention.
They are never straight forward. Talk to a toxic person and they will never give you a straight answer.
They are manipulators. They manipulate people and situations as they like to feel superior so they have the urge to control others. In their mind people should follow them without doubting them.
Everyone deserve supportive, loving and people who they like to spend time with. People with an over flowing negativity make sure to pour that negativity in our lives too. A small chat with a toxic person can make you feel bad about yourself. They have a tendency to lower your morales that you might end up locking your room and think about your useless existence for hours.

There are ways to put a stop to the nonsense of toxic people and live your life your way.

Speak up
First and foremost step is to speak up for yourself. No one has the right to put you down in any way. If you find someone saying something that you’re uncomfortable with just tell them to stop right on their faces before they take advantage of your inability to say no. Convey them that they should not take you for granted. Tell them to go somewhere else and pour out their negativity as you’re not interested in talking to them unless they have something good, reasonable or logical to talk about. Never ever let anyone take advantage of you or your position.

Do not become a victim
Never indulge in any negative conversation with a toxic person. If you tell them about any person chances are they will most likely spread it making you look bad.
They might manipulate you into gossiping so stay away from them and avoid having long conversations with them.

Avoid a toxic person
The best way to avoid a toxic person is by not interacting with them at all and avoiding them at all cost. The less you interact with them, the less they will feed you their negativity and you will live a peaceful and happy life.

A word of advice is to always be with the people who love you and who you love. Surround yourself with positive people and their positive energy will make you happy and lively too. Spread love, happiness and positivity. Enjoy your life.

Know the type of your dream

Ever dreamt that you were with the one you love the most at some place which is beyond the definition of beautiful?

Or dreamt of being in an exam hall where you run out of time but you didn’t know the answers to the questions anyway.

A dream where you find yourself at an unimaginable serene place not less than heaven or a dream of being United with your family?

Indeed, we all see dreams while we sleep every now and then and in order to understand ourselves better it is important to know our dreams.
It is safe to say that dreams can be categorized into 3 major types, knowingly:
1) Holy/Spiritual dreams
2) Desires/Wants
3) Thoughts/Memories

The first kind of dreams are rare to occur but holds great meaning in them. Seeing God in a dream or watching oneself in heavenly place can be examples of such category. It is believed that these kinds of dreams are highly positive and true but people can hardly understand the hidden messages they hold.

The second type of dreams, which are the desires and wishes of an individual, are more common to occur as we tend to constantly wish for things and it gets imprinted into our subconscious at some time. Thus, seeing a loved one or partner in a dream is merely depiction of our desires which takes the form of visuals in our sleep. Sometimes desires and thoughts are interchangeable and related which makes it harder to separate desires from thought-form of dreams.

Finally, the third type is the most recurring and common type of dreams. Our brain functions round the clock and is never free of thoughts. Thoughts can be memories or current phenomenon. But they get hold of greater part of our dream formation. A person going through break-up is likely to see glimpses of past memories re-enacted in their dreams. Such type of dreams are also a coping mechanism for stress and depression.

Dreams are naturally occurring phenomenon which can not be explained properly by any individual because it has unique value and experience for each individual just like love has.

I hope you liked the article.

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Mother’s Day Special

Thank you all for taking out some time to read my article. I genuinely appreciate it. I love my mother the most and try to be like her but if I turn out to be a fraction of her I would consider that as my achievement. I, being a mom, love my kid to bits. I would do and can do anything for him. These are the same thoughts and feelings of every mom around the globe. They always put their children ahead of themselves. Some days are just better than the others where you struggle less, but every day is a new struggle for them to make the world best for the small people they have created (that would be our children). Your efforts can never go unnoticed.
Mothers build a whole new generation. Mothers are the building blocks of the society. Whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mom, you all deserve a noble prize for doing such a good work.

None of you applied for this job, you just got one and even though you guys never had any prior experience and any prior knowledge about it, you still are acing it. This job doesn’t need a degree neither you’ll have defined work hours. You have to work round the clock without any pay or incentive. You will have to sacrifice your sleep, your body figure, peace, appearance and sanity at times. You would do anything and everything for your children. In my religion, a mother has the highest place.
We think mothers have some kind of super powers because they make miracles happen. It’s not true but I being a mother know that I would go to any length to make things right for my baby and keep him happy no matter the cost.
I always thought motherhood would be very easy but oh boy was I wrong. Lol. It is without a doubt the toughest job in the world. Can you imagine being pooped on, being vomitted on and still would stay that way to clean the other person before you?? No you won’t. But this is the charm of being a mother, you put your needs and desires second and your baby always first !
There is no criteria of being a great mom. In my view, every mom is a great mom. Sometimes the kids get on our nerves but still we want them to be happy. We love watching them grow, play and explore the world. Motherhood is a unique experience for everyone but never take your mother for granted. Spend quality time with her, make her feel special and do everything for her that she would have done for you. Let’s not forget what our mothers have done for us. Now it’s our duty to make them happy. We cannot and should not limit ourselves to just this one day instead we should give them time more often and make them happy and feel needed. What we’ll do today for our mothers, tomorrow our children will do the same for us.
In the end I would like to say that no doubt motherhood is a quite challenging and demanding job yet we all mothers try our best to give our best. I am so grateful for having the best mom and I try to be the best mom to my baby boy. Wishing you all a happy mother’s day. You all are doing a great job and everybody knows that by now. Cherish these moments and pray for me and my family.
Dedicated to all mothers. I hope you liked the article 😊

He was never into you (Guest post by Ash)

Do you ever wonder if he truly belongs to you? What if all his cute little acts are just memories of his past that he tends to renact with you? Would you feel comfortable with his divided love for you or would you rather walk away? The answer depends on how much can you endure!

He was all that love a woman asks for: Paying attention, calling cute names, doing little acts of love and even talking about building a family.
Seems promising, right? But the twist comes when you give in yourself to him emotionally and he senses the threat of you walking away is near to impossible. So he changes. He changes emotionally and totally. You complain, fight, cry and finally get depressed with the whole situation. Eventually you find out from his friends that he is in touch with his ex. And whatever lil’ acts of love from him were already spent well enough with the ex to become memories which he used as his medicine by re-living, to get through the pain of distance from his ex. He never was over her. Infact he was never into you !

Give it a thumbs up if you like the article. Xoxo

Things men are good at

Hi everyone. Hope you all are doing fine. Today I’ll write about a very controversial topic so fasten your seat belts. I can write only a single word or a one line and end the topic giving my verdict but I want to elaborate. It’s not a mystery but a known fact but still it doesn’t hurt to talk about it. So here we go.

It is an agreed fact that men have more brains than women they just use it less. However they know how and when to use their brain when it’s something related to them but somehow they use it less in OUR case. I don’t want to start a war here but this is what I have seen. Men in general are innocent creatures with a BIG brain which they rarely use.
Areas where they use their brain occasionally always include women. They can do their hard office work but somehow can’t figure out how to help their wives or girlfriends at home. Pretty innocent creature I told you.
They can carry out their office tasks without anyone standing over their heads to remind them after every half an hour. But again somehow forgets what their wives/girlfriends told them to bring for grocery even if they text their man a thousand times.
They never forget a file or any office diary at home but wow they manage to forget to buy a gift for their wives/girlfriends.
On top of everything they always always remember important business meeting and seminars but they are a pro at forgetting anniversaries and birthdays of their wives and girlfriends.
I mean why are they so good at forgetting our anniversaries and birthdays? Forgetting whatever we tell them?
Women never forget their birthdays. We wait for the birthdays and anniversaries. Most of the times we’re the ones wishing the whole universe on their birthdays and anniversaries but the men in our life still forget ours. Yeah it hurts I know. But they’re busy at work and it’s difficult to remember things you know we should be more understanding. Well we have a lot on our plate too still we remember things about our loved ones. It’s just a matter of priorities.

I’m not saying all men do this but most of them does. And as a result most of the women go through this. It’s easy to remember the dates if you can’t do it with your brain. Let me help you. Put a reminder, write it down and pin it on your refrigerator. Put the dates as a wall paper on your laptops as men spend a lot of their time on laptop working. Do whatever it makes it easy to remember.
Remembering important things about your partner is just a gesture but a gesture that matters a lot to your partner. She will cherish it. She will love you even more knowing that you care for her and remember the things that make her happy. Eventually less bickering and less fights. As they say “happy wife, happy life”.
I guess it’s enough ranting for one day. Even though I did not plan to rant this much but you know sometimes you get triggered by some things you see around you. I hope none of you took it to your heart.

Salaam Ramadan !

Ramadan is a holy and sacred month for Muslims. It is one of the five pillars of Islam. There are some things I would like to share about ramadan with all of you.

In this month the Muslims feel the pain and hardships of poor people.
Ramadan comes once every year. Ramadan comes every year at different dates because of the lunar calendar. As the dates change so does the length of the fast. A fast starts after the fajar azaan, before sunrise and ends at maghrib azaan, after the sun sets. In ramadan Muslims all over the world abstain from eating, drinking, immoral behaviour, bad deeds and having sexual relations during their fast.
Waking up before sunrise to eat something which would make you full enough to spend the whole fast with that food is called sehri. Some people don’t do sehri at all and spend the whole fast on their dinner and some get up early and eat. But all have to close their fast before hearing the fajar azan with a sehri prayer.
Muslims don’t eat anything at all during their fast neither they drink anything not even water. Neither they use foul language or get angry as it against to do such in ramadan.
As Islam has a flexibility for children, women, older people and ill people so it happens in ramadan as well. Fasting is not obligatory to the children who haven’t reached adolescence yet. The same goes for pregnant women and ill people. Women in their time of the month are also exempted from fasting for only those days. No one forces you to fast although it is farz in Islam to fast once you reach puberty but no one does and can force the other to fast as forcing the religion is not permissible in Islam. But if the children want to fast, the adults let them fast for half day and call it a mock half day fast.
Eating, drinking or having sexual relation during your fast invalidates it.

Muslims open their fast on maghrib azaan, it’s called iftar, with an iftar prayer and start with a date usually or they can open with anything sweet. Then they can eat anything they want to till sehri again.

After iftar they have an additional prayer called tarawih. The whole Quran is being recited in tarawih within a month. Gents offer tarawih at mosque in congregation and the ladies can do it either at mosques or at their homes.
At then end of ramadan Muslims are rewarded in the form of eid for fasting for one month and staying away from all the bad deeds.
I’ll discuss eid in some other article. I hope you find this article informative.

‘Bandersnatch’ Review

This is my review of this movie and it can be different from others.
Bandersnatch was released on Dec 28, 2018 on Netflix. It’s an interactive movie by Black Mirror.

It makes you feel like as if you’re the director of the movie but you’re not. You’re only given two choices and you have to choose from them. If you make the right choice, according to the author, you’ll move to the next level. On making a wrong choice the movie will start from the part where you made the wrong choice, just like a game.
You can somewhat control the character named Stefan, who in the movie is a game programmer of making such choosing the options type games.
The interesting thing I found in the movie was that the other character always gave Stefan the choice of options but the character emphasized on a certain action more so Stefan would select that choice and the movie will move forward. If he does the opposite, the movie ends abruptly and you have to start over again from the wrongly opted option part.
Bandersnatch gave me a feeling of being stuck in a time dimension loop and you have to repeat the whole procedure in order to make things right, they way they’re programmed in the movie. This was the part I did not like at all. They must have stories for all the options other than abrupt endings. So every viewer will have a different ending. So Bandersnatch did not offer much choices.
Another interesting part was of Colin who somehow remembered that he saw Stefan somewhere. You have to be really attentive to know the codes the characters give in their dialogues.
First I selected to take the tuckersoft jobs and it ended the movie right there. Not good bandersnatch not good.
Then I chose to pour tea on the computer as I did not like shouting on the dad but guess what? This is what they wanted. My movie again ended.
Then everything was going fine the next time and I did even shouted at dad, did not want to though, but still I destroyed the computer. This time I was so annoyed and my brain was about to give up but I really wanted to end the movie so I gave it another last try.
I reached dead ends three times. Almost gave up and then followed the codes completely believing that I’m not the one in control and got to the end. Voila!
Although I did not take the LSD I somehow did. Weird but I so wanted to end the movie and made Stefan jump. Lol. I killed him. Even when he jumped I thought they might make me do it all again but gladly they did not.
I believe from I have heard there are five endings to the movie. No matter what you chose, the movie is quite exhausting. The starting over again part annoyed me.
I would not recommend it to any mom though. But if you have time and you want to play a weird game then go for it.

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Do not fear childbirth, there is no gas and air for MOTHERHOOD

Trust me when I say this because I had the hardest childbirth one can think of. The doctors tried everything on ne and then at the end induced me. But even my childbirth has no comparison to motherhood. I can compare motherhood to a sea of fire !!! Yes and you have to reach the other end daily. Hahaha.
Let me introduce you to my 22 months old baby, Muhammad.

Can you see the spark in his eyes? Yes me too. That’s the spark of mischievousness. He causes a tornado wherever he goes and then he gets the attention he wants. My baby Muhammad is always on the run and he wants “nom nom” all the time. He wanders in the whole house aimlessly then point out in one direction to tell me that he wants that thing. Now the tricky part is “that thing” is not visible to us normal people but only to my baby Muhammad. He sees it and he wants it and it would be better for you to find it quick otherwise there will be a tantrum tornado with lots and lots of tears and hitting with his baby hands. So I keep showing him stuff and he keeps saying no to everything I show. After some 15 minutes he selects something and take it to the bed and play with it for some seconds then throw it away. Now he wants some other invisible thing.
As he is a super active baby he is always willing to play. But he wants me to play with him as well. . . He is no 1 football fan. I cannot even think of sitting down in the middle and catch my breath. Nope not a chance. As long as he doesn’t get exhausted we have to play like a pro. Lol.
He doesn’t let us watch tv too. Firstly he wants the remote in his hand and then he watches bo bo baby on netflix (boss baby). So basically he netflix’s and chill. If we don’t do what he says, he fakes cry and if we still don’t do it, he cries in real. Yes so we have to do everything he says.
He has a chair and he takes his favourite chair (at the moment) everywhere. I mean everywhere. Wherever he goes, he runs to find his chair and then drag it with him, to the kitchen, to the washroom, to our lawn, even to our car. If I tell him not to drag it everywhere he screams (again his tantrum) but then I back off. You know he’s the law in our house. You just can’t deny anything he says otherwise you will get your ears bleed from his screams and a very long cry. This little baby even accompanies me to the toilet !! And wants me to hold him there. Lol. In a split second he brings his favourite chair and sits with me and chat. I try to make him leave the bathroom but he fakes cry. Hahaha
We cannot point our finger to him because he hates it. Ever since he started sitting he does not let us point finger at him. He fights back and slaps our fingers. Now he points his finger back at us and I don’t know what he says but he gets angry and keep on talking till we stay quiet and listens to him. Me and my husband does not know who told him that pointing finger is bad but I guess the old fellow in him knows somehow. Even if he’s standing a mile away and you point finger at him he will come running to u just to slap your finger and say something in his baby language like do not point this finger at me ok !!!
Hiding our things is his favourite time pass. We search for our things all day and we would end giving up. One day we had to go out on a dinner with my husband’s colleagues and we were unable to find our car keys. We searched for it for one hour then our servant brought it to us from the laundry room because our son hid it in the there. I mean how can he take the key safely all the way from our room to the laundry room. This little man is very clever. He knows how to get things out of us one way or the other and we HAVE to do what he says.
There is no way of saying NO to him because he doesn’t want to hear no. If I don’t listen to him he’ll make me listen to him. He is a difficult clever but cutest baby.
I can and I will do anything for him. After all of the nonsense he puts me through, his one smile is enough to make me get back from the edge and love him like crazy and he knows it. I know he knows it that’s why he keeps me running on my toes all the time.
This is just a glimpse of my baby Muhammad and my hectic day with him but at the end of the day I’m still smiling as I put him in his bed and see his cute face I forget everything and gather my energy back for another day with baby Muhammad.
The post got longer than I expected that’s why I cut it short. I hope you like it

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A thing of beauty is not joy for everyone !

Don’t you love a new baby and feel like holding him? No doubt babies are a beautiful blessing from God. Some people get way more excited like over the moon for having one and think their life got perfect after the new addition to the family. Then there are women who get deeply depressed after having a baby which makes then unable to bond with their new baby. Its not something we WANT to feel but some of us feel it anyway.
I had my first baby 22 months ago through a normal delivery and I thought after having him I would be the happiest, my life would be perfect. I would love my baby more than anything else. My baby boy was born at 5pm . I was so happy to see him for the first time. I touched him and kissed him. I loved looking at my little bundle of joy. But things took a drastic turn for me the next day when I took him home with me.

He was a very difficult baby to start. He did not sleep at night and even in the day time our whisper was enough to wake him up. I could not sleep at all. Every time I try to sleep his cries would wake me up. On the other hand I was not willing to let anyone do his work. I would check his diaper a million times. Even if he was asleep at times I could not make myself sleep. I would never leave my house without him pooping. If he poops again outside I would panic so much that people around me got anxiety themselves.
I was stressed beyond limits. I was seriously thinking of giving him to someone who would take care of him and needed a baby. In my mind I was sure that “this baby has made my life difficult and he is the reason of my sadness and unable to enjoy any occasion or anything at all”.

Most of the time I was sad and crying. My baby was not bonding with me neither I was feeling attached to my baby like a mother should. He would cry his lungs out after my touch and I was not able to calm him down. My mom or my husband helped me but still I was not enjoying MOTHERHOOD. It still hurts me to think of my reaction towards my baby after his cries. Breastfeeding him was a nightmare for me. I was feeling bound. I was taking care of my baby as if it was part of my job, just do the task without any feeling. I totally neglected my appearance.
I shared my feelings with my mom but she told me to keep it together and helped me with everything. She would make me meet other moms and they shared their motherhood experiences saying that it’s normal. My mom counselled me about motherhood and I shared everything with her. Then my husband helped me deal with these issues.
I got out of this phase after 9 months of my baby’s birth and started enjoying my life with my baby. My mom and my husband helped me get out of that phase. I did not know why I was feeling like this and what is this disorder. Most of the new mothers don’t know it either. I thought I should educate them from my personal experience so they could relate to it and get help.
After some time I got to know about POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION and I was glad to know that I got out of it with the help of my loved ones. So yes postpartum depression is real and it eats the mind of the new mother.
If any of you out there is going through this phase or know someone who is, please help her out because she needs help.
Help her out with her baby, encourage her to talk about her feelings. Take her out more often. Support her. Always always take her to a counsellor if things don’t get better otherwise her situation might get worse.
I hope you find this article helpful.

Mothers, the unpaid labours

Labours day is a holiday when we honour the working men and women around the world for their services. Every working person thinks of it as a day off, to relax and to enjoy, gather their energy. But there are some labours which work 24/7 even on a labours day and they don’t even get paid for it in cash. No doubt they get paid in the form of unconditional love but no money for the hard work they do neither they ever demand anything in return. Yes, all of you must have guessed by now. I am talking about a MOTHER. A strong women who works round the clock and without any break. A mother doesn’t even get paid for the services she provides. They have the most toughest job in the world. She sacrifices her sleep, peace and time, everything for her children. She is always on duty working and is always available for her children.
On labour day when everyone waits for the holiday and enjoys it, there are mothers still working and giving time to their children. On this labours day we all should be grateful of such mothers who are raising a whole new generation and helping us build a better tomorrow without demanding anything in return preforming the biggest duty.
On this labours day I want to thank all of the mothers for the hard labour you do. I salute all the mothers on this labours day for their unpaid services, their sacrifices and their efforts. Happy labours day ! Xoxo